The emptiness...

Everyone may feel this way sometimes, an impending hole lurking in your soul. We all have some suffering that we all struggle with. Some people handle it differently than others. In my case, I filled my hole with eating disorder behaviors, pills, exercise, and alcohol. The hole was still there but I was just too numbed out to realize it. Once, I began my journey on my path to recovery, I faintly realized I was numbing out - running away from my past.
My past still haunts me till this day. Eventually I will talk about it, but for now the scars are too deep and are still healing. But, I do realize now, that all the pain and suffering I have endured is becoming less prominent. The more I reach out, journal, read books, practice self-acceptance, speak to my supports and go to therapy, the less suffering is done on my part . Sometimes I wonder if I ever will forgive and let go. I know the important part of acceptance is understanding and acknowledging things, not necessarily attempting to change it or agree with it. A big struggle of mine is remembering and accepting.
                                                                                                  -A.N.T.

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