Live, Love, and Laugh

Live, Laugh, and Love:

The opposite of how I feel lately. I blindly hit a bump in the road on my journey. Just when things start to feel "normal," things fall apart. The illusion of being recovered and in recovery was so diluted by my E.D. that I have fallen backwards two steps.

Recently, I have learned a great amount of insight with my recovery, to the point that I have questioned it. This isn't the first time I have had an eye-opening experience. There are several times, on my road, that I have become truthful to myself. It is one of the hardest things to do. You can try to fool everyone else, but truly you are only fooling yourself. It was in the eye of severe illness that I began to realize a lot. It's not until  you take responsibility and be an adult in life that you really understand the struggles inside and outside.

Instead of thinking of what I can't do, I am really trying to think of all the things I can do. I am trying to change my way of thinking, so I won't remain stuck in the rut. Part of becoming unstuck, is being honest with myself and everyone else. Only I can truly become recovered and control my own destiny. It is just believing in myself that is the toughest. Today, I reach out to discover the unknown. I must take what was given to me this week and take action. It is time to take control of my life. If it means going back "to the basics" then so be it. But i refuse to take another two steps backwards before I take a step forward.

I want to Live, Laugh, and Love again and again.

                                                                                                -A.N.T.